Hispanic Chamber of Commerce

“Monette’s Mindful Management: Wants, Needs And Pajamas, Part II of III”
November 2009

By Monette Benoit
Copyright by Monette Benoit, All Rights Reserved.

Mindful management is a term I share when I’m coaching, tutoring and assisting professionals and students with test prep. I desire to share mindful management moments with you.

Part I is linked November 5th: www.monettebenoit.com

Part II:

I began the Sunday phone conversation, “Hey, it’s Part II of the Back-to-School Special and this Event is for Wants.”

When the nephews arrived shortly thereafter, I asked each, “What is it that you want?” They sat silent, head down.

I softly asked if I could share an experience from my childhood. The boys nodded.

I shared: “Each Christmas my family drove 33 miles to my granny’s apartment. We then walked up four flights of stairs. My three brothers received, every year, what they needed – pajamas.”

“My brothers learned (instructed and often reminded each year by my parents) not to roll their eyes, not to toss the package backward – and were reminded how they should behave upon receipt of the very gift they absolutely did not want on Christmas.

Me? I received one gold pendant for my charm bracelet. Typically, my brothers did not speak to me during ‘gifting’ while they narrowed their eyes at their pajamas and my small box.”

The mindful experience I shared with my nephews that Sunday was:

“The pajamas were what each brother wanted, and needed, the day after Christmas. But never on Christmas. Since budgets were tight, my parents asked Granny for the one thing they (parents) needed for their sons each year.”

The boys listened intently.

I softly shared, “What you want and what you need will often be two things. Pajamas on Christmas morning is a need. What was wanted by boys – my brothers – on Christmas morning were trucks, sporting equipment or a gift coupon for a store. Cash would have been better – perhaps every child’s wish who ‘needs’ money.”

“Yesterday was a need. You received pajamas on Christmas. Now, let’s figure out what you want. What do you really want for that first day of school?”

They eagerly shared details.

One nephew really wanted T-shirts (all striped), jeans, and shorts (all checkered).

One nephew really wanted football cleats, T-shirts (not striped) and over-sized jeans (not checkered).

They beamed while describing their ‘wants’.

Off they went to the store with their mother. …

Part III will be posted November 30, 2009.

Mylegal.com Contributing Editor, Monette Benoit, B.B.A., CRI, CPE, may be reached at www.CRRbooks.com and www.ARTCS.com for private coaching.

Monette Benoit, B. B.A., CCR, CRI, CPE, Paralegal
Motivation Management & Life Coach,

Tutor and Multiple Title Author of Books & Test Prep for the Court Reporting & Captioning Industry
Realtime Court Reporter, Instructor, Consultant, Columnist

Court Reporter Reference Books & CDs: www.CRRbooks.com

Blog: Monette’s Musings, www.monettebenoit.com

* Educational/Career Advancement; Private Tutoring/Customized Coaching

All American RealTime/Captioning Services, Inc.: www.ARTCS.com

Did You Know: You can accelerate your career with private tutoring and coaching?

Court reporting veteran Monette Benoit can help you achieve your goals.

Coaching topics include:

* Motivation skills to keep you moving forward,
* Time-management skills,
* Process learning for more effective retention,
* Communication skills and daily interaction improvement skills, and much more.

Who comes to Monette for tutoring and coaching?

* Veteran court reporters and captioners brushing up on their skills for test-taking requirements,
* In-class students who feel they’re falling behind or aren’t ready for the required tests,
* Students or veterans who struggle with focus, goal-setting, time-management or other life skills that might be interfering in their upward success,
* At-home students who want to ensure they’re on track for their exam and career goals,
* Veteran court reporters and captioners expanding their career options in related fields,
* Students and veterans alike who find they’re struggling with one or two key areas of daily practice,
* Students or veterans who have begun to question their career or whether they’re on the “right track” …

Check It Out: Reach Your Goals! Tutoring and Coaching

http://crrbooks.com/index.php?cPath=29

Monette Benoit can help you achieve at much high levels. Where do you want to go? What have you really wanted to do with your career, and ultimately, your life? Specific custom-designed guidance efficiently assists you!

About Monette Benoit:

As a 25+year court reporter, CART provider, author of NCRA test prep material and an instructor, Monette Benoit has taught multiple theories, academics, all speed classes and the 225 homeroom within NCRA-approved schools and a community college. She understands the challenges many adults now face in our industry and schooling.

Monette Benoit has worked with thousands of professionals, court reporters, students and instructors. She has also helped create new court reporting training programs, worked with federal grants, and assisted instructors in developing curriculum for both in-class and at-home students.
Her one-on-one tutoring has greatly assisted thousands of students, novice and experienced professionals to privately reach the next level.

Mindful management is a term I share when I’m coaching and assisting others. I desire to share mindful management moments with you.

Monette’s Mindful Management: Wants, Needs And Pajamas, Part I of III
November 2009

By Monette Benoit
Copyright by Monette Benoit, All Rights Reserved.

Part II may be read November 15, 2009: www.monettebenoit.com
Part III may be read November 30, 2009: www.monettebenoit.com

Back-to-school for young adults (junior high) is momentous, yes? This year pre-back-to-school events in my family created a lifetime lesson. Sometimes a whole lesson – to include multiple generations with learned experiences – is summed up with a few words in my family.

Two nephews ‘needing’ items for back-to-school sat on my couch, head down. Their father, my brother, due to our economy, is unemployed. Pennies are tight; the young adults know this. Both are in honors classes. One recently earned a 100 on his TAKS, Texas Assessment of Knowledge and Skills, test. He does not speak about this; he doesn’t “think it’s a big deal.” Instead he focuses on football and X-box …

I decided to have a “Hey, it’s Back-to-School Event!” to create adventure, fun and to help where I may.

The nephews smiled – and spoke about football practice, and what they will need for football. They did not share items for school and chose their words carefully. Then their mother said, “They need shoes.”

I calculated an amount and gave each nephew the total, so they could pick what they wanted. Note I use the word ‘want’ while others used ‘need’.

My husband, their WBU, World’s Best Uncle, set off with two eager young men, one on each side. I thought all was right with the world.

That evening when my husband returned he said, “That was work!”

Me: “Work? It was fun, right?”

Husband: “No, it was work!!!”

I phoned my nephews. Each was reluctant to share.

In summary, their uncle had stuck to the ‘need’ list given to them by a parent. That night I learned one nephew had new shoes. One had items he needed.

Each had received a new package of socks, which – they needed.

My reaction was, “Socks????”

I could not fathom how the T-shirts and jeans we had spoken about that afternoon did not materialize in their hands and closets. I learned that the ‘need’ list was the only shopping list that day.

Rather than upset everyone Saturday evening, I listened, then waited until the next morning to phone after church.

I began the Sunday phone conversation, “Hey, it’s Part II of the Back-to-School ‘Wants’ Special, and this event is for Wants.”

When the nephews arrived shortly thereafter, I asked each, “What is it that you want?” They sat silent, head down.

I softly asked if I could share an experience from my childhood. The boys nodded.

Part II will be posted November 15, 2009.

Mylegal.com Contributing Editor, Monette Benoit, B.B.A., CRI, CPE, may be reached at www.CRRbooks.com and www.ARTCS.com for private coaching.

Monette Benoit may be reached at: Tutoring@CRRbooks.com

Monette Benoit, B. B.A., CCR, CRI, CPE, Paralegal
Motivation Management & Life Coach,
Tutor and Multiple Title Author of Books & Test Prep for the Court Reporting & Captioning Industry
Realtime Court Reporter, Instructor, Consultant, Columnist

Court Reporter Reference Books & CDs: www.CRRbooks.com

Blog: Monette’s Musings, www.monettebenoit.com

* Educational/Career Advancement; Private Tutoring/Customized Coaching

All American RealTime/Captioning Services, Inc.: www.ARTCS.com

Did You Know: You can accelerate your career with private tutoring and coaching?

Court reporting veteran Monette Benoit can help you achieve your goals.

Coaching topics include:

* Motivation skills to keep you moving forward,
* Time-management skills,
* Process learning for more effective retention,
* Communication skills and daily interaction improvement skills, and much more.

Who comes to Monette for tutoring and coaching?

* Veteran court reporters and captioners brushing up on their skills for test-taking requirements,
* In-class students who feel they’re falling behind or aren’t ready for the required tests,
* Students or veterans who struggle with focus, goal-setting, time-management or other life skills that might be interfering in their upward success,
* At-home students who want to ensure they’re on track for their exam and career goals,
* Veteran court reporters and captioners expanding their career options in related fields,
* Students and veterans alike who find they’re struggling with one or two key areas of daily practice,
* Students or veterans who have begun to question their career or whether they’re on the “right track” …

Check It Out: Reach Your Goals! Tutoring and Coaching

http://crrbooks.com/index.php?cPath=29

Monette Benoit can help you achieve at much high levels. Where do you want to go? What have you really wanted to do with your career, and ultimately, your life? Specific custom-designed guidance efficiently assists you!

About Monette Benoit:

As a 25+year court reporter, CART provider, author of NCRA test prep material and an instructor, Monette Benoit has taught multiple theories, academics, all speed classes and the 225 homeroom within NCRA-approved schools and a community college. She understands the challenges many adults now face in our industry and schooling.

Monette Benoit has worked with thousands of professionals, court reporters, students and instructors. She has also helped create new court reporting training programs, worked with federal grants, and assisted instructors in developing curriculum for both in-class and at-home students.

Her one-on-one tutoring has greatly assisted thousands of students, novice and experienced professionals to privately reach the next level.

Monette’s Mindful Management

Copyright by Monette Benoit, All Rights Reserved.

Part I, posted September 15th, shared “Choose Carefully: Choosing Your Answer Well, Part I of III”

This post contains “Choose Carefully: Choose Your Question Well, Part II of III”

The next morning I attended the invitation-only breakfast (with bankers). I arrived at 6:30, the mixer still a fresh memory. I was quickly informed, “This is a problem.”

The gentleman who invited me said, “Everyone is seated. You missed initial introductions.”

I gritted my teeth and said, “I missed the turn in the darkness and had to circle the entire city to find the dang entry.” He howled with laughter

He reminded me to keep my goal. I asked where the power table was; where were the bankers? He pointed to a table with multiple empty chairs. My friend smiled proudly as I headed off a little more confidant.

I walked to their table; I politely asked if a chair was available. I did not wear a hat or nametag.

They looked at me like I had three heads and said, “No.”

I focused on not speaking multiple words and calmly walked back to my friend near the doorway.

He was already in full gut-busting laughter. “You really do want this. Good for you! You’re going to have to sit over there (indicating). I have a chair reserved for you. You will do just fine there. Go.”

I looked deep into his eyes, avoided sighing (or mumbling).

He continued to laugh out loud, and rubbed one of my shoulders while I reassessed my moment. Watching my new friend intently, I headed off to my table.

Later he told me, “No one had ever asked to join the head table. One is asked.” Now he tells me.

After I sat, my friend approached and shared that I was his guest. I remained silent, then watched as he strolled away.

When he glanced back with a huge smile I did not blink, nor smile. We had an entire conversation with that one look.

During breakfast I was asked if I would like to attend a luncheon.

I had a full-time teaching job (two shifts) at the community college; that morning I had agreed to pay cash to a teacher to take my classes, so I could attend this breakfast. Truly

In response to the invite, I hoped I didn’t sound overwhelmed and replied, “Of course. When might that be?”

Details were shared: approximately one thousand people attend scheduled lunches; specific individuals, members, introduce themselves, speaking about their service and company

I just knew this was another opportunity – a new mindful moment. Chin up, I replied, “Yes, I will attend – if I can speak.”

They discussed this, and when they replied that they would make an exception for my first luncheon and help me, I sat tall.

I paused and said slowly, “I have one condition.” The leaders at this table did not laugh.

They sincerely inquired, “And what is that?”

I knew the answers last night, the questions this morning, and this possible condition was another opportunity that could change everything.

Chin up, I softly said, “I want to speak second.”

No one asked me why. They shared details. Then I was informed, “Yes, you may be second.”

My reason? I knew with this ‘new moment’ and standing in front of approximately one thousand people waiting to speak, listening for others to begin and finish, I just might find that exit door.

Leaving the invite-only breakfast launched the one unfortunate (and awkward) moment thus far with my ‘needing’ to seek new goals. I heard my name …

Monette’s Mindful Management, “Choose Carefully: Choose Well” Part III will be shared in two weeks.

MyLegal.com Contributing Editor, Monette Benoit, B.B.A., CRI, CPE, may be reached at www.CRRbooks.com and www.ARTCS.com for private customized coaching and tutoring.

Realtime Court Reporter, Instructor, Consultant, Columnist Educational/Career Advancement

Blog: Monette’s Musings, www.monettebenoit.com

Please contact Monette@CRRbooks.com to request permission to repost or to add a link to this article, which was first posted on www.mylegal.com, September 30, 2009.

Monette Benoit, B. B.A., CCR, CRI, CPE 
Realtime Court Reporter, Instructor, Consultant, Columnist 

Coach, Tutor and Multiple Title Author of Books & Test Prep for the
Court Reporting
& Captioning Industry


About the Author:

Monette Benoit, B.B.A., CCR, CRI, CPE, is a JCR Contributing Editor for the National Court Reporters Association, NCRA.

She is the author of multiple books and Test Prep for the Court Reporting & Captioning Industry to include the national and state RPR, RMR, RDR, CSR ‘Written Knowledge Exam’ Textbook, Workbook, Companion Study Guide, ‘The CRRT WKT’ CD Software Program, Advanced SAT, LSAT, GRE, Real-Time Vocabulary Workbook and ‘CATapult’ Your Dictionary CD Software Program series.

Books, CDs, private tutoring, mentoring services and articles may be referenced www.crrbooks.com/

Monette is an experienced consultant, instructor, real-time court reporter, tutor, life coach, CART provider, columnist.

She teaches, tutors and coaches home-study students, college students, court reporters and professionals. Monette speaks to groups at state, national and international conventions about motivation, technology, expanding skills and Deaf, Oral Deaf, Hard of Hearing.

Monette Benoit, B.B.A., Certified Court Reporter, Certified Reporting Instructor, Certified Program Evaluator, Paralegal, may be reached at: http://www.crrbooks.com/ http://www.catapultdix.com/ and All American RealTime/Captioning Services, Inc.: http://www.artcs.com/

Monette’s Mindful Management

By Monette Benoit, All Rights Reserved.

Choose Carefully: Choose Your Answer Well, Part I of III

This is the first of a new commitment I desire to share. I know we will learn from each other as we create new goals, new realities and new horizons. This is my wish.

Two or three times a month I will share mindful management. I am honored to have this opportunity, and from time to time I will open the kimono onto my heart. Now let’s move forward together.

Mindful management is a term I share when I’m coaching and assisting others in setting goals. I learned this term well.

Within my world, when a moment approaches and one knows that the answer, comment, question – words or lack thereof – will truly change the world as one knows it, this I have defined as mindful management.

In 1993 I had such a moment creating a new service to my community. Though San Antonio is the eighth largest city in the U.S., I was challenged trying to find how to share my services.

I had a different mission; I needed to do this. I knew people needed my service. I had prayed and received a sign.

If one believes in miracles, then that is what occurred.

If one does not believe in miracles, then it was a ‘Star Trek’ moment.

As I worked and juggled my priorities and responsibilities, I researched the chamber of commerce (we have many) and decided to join the Hispanic Chamber. I had my personal and professional reasons for this choice. I phoned; they could not have been nicer answering my questions.

The chamber hosts a mixer (their term) where professionals gather to meet, socialize and to conduct business. I ensured I was not teaching or providing captioning/CART for deaf and or hard-of-hearing consumers. Then I prepped for this opportunity.

The mixer was in a brewery. Truly. When I pulled into the parking lot, it took quite a while to find a parking spot. I was so nervous that I drove the block a few times debating if I really wanted to do this.

When I parked, as I gathered myself to begin this endeavor, I grabbed a hat I keep in my car. The hat that night was deep blue.

I paid my entry fee and stuck the paper to my shirt with my name (as required). The room had approximately 700 people who were already mixing.

Did I mention this was a brewery?

When I entered the large room, members were talking and laughing. I appeared to be the only individual standing alone, perhaps the only one who was not Hispanic standing near the doorway.

I was the only person wearing a blue bolero. I took a deep breath and walked into the loud, crowded room.

People watched – clearly watched me. I stood tall and worked to avoid looking nervous. Butterflies (and gentle fireflies) were in my stomach; I viewed doors for a possible exit.

But I had committed to this, so I worked to last a few minutes … walking alone, stopping and waiting. A few ‘mixers’ smiled, some nodded, but no one spoke to me.

I just knew there had to be a hospitality committee. I just knew (and hoped) someone would walk over and say hello. If not, I could still see the doors to the parking lot. I worked to avoid staring (longingly) at the exit doors.

Just as I seriously considered backing out of the room (to avoid anyone noticing my exit) a gentleman approached. He looked at me, then my hat.

He tilted his head, raised one eyebrow, and slowly said, “And … what can I do for you?”

I heard the tone in his voice and froze.

I had prepped thoroughly, but did not have an answer for ‘this’ question. I then worked to avoid looking nervous.

Finally I looked to him, chin up, and slowly said, “Introduce me to the most powerful people in this room.”

He paused and said, “Okay. Come with me.”

He took my left elbow, introducing himself as we walked.

Several groups stepped aside, nodding to this gentleman as we strolled into the middle of this large room.

He leaned over and whispered, “I hope you brought your business card.” I nodded.

He asked what I wanted from the evening; I had that answer prepared in short sentences.

The gentleman escorted me to three groups. After assertive introductions, names, companies, facts and a firm handshake from each person (business cards also exchanged) he said, “You’ve met the powerful people. You can go now. Really. Or you can get a drink, stay and relax.”

I paused, simply nodding. (I was still working to appear calm.)

He smiled and joked, “Well, now you can have some fun, Monette. By the way, want to meet all the bankers? Come to a breakfast tomorrow morning. I’ll introduce you. Now tell me what it is you really want.”

Monette’s Mindful Management, “Choose Carefully: Choose Your Question Well” Part II will be shared in two weeks.

MyLegal.com Contributing Editor, Monette Benoit, B.B.A., CRI, CPE, may be reached at www.CRRbooks.com and www.ARTCS.com for private customized coaching and tutoring.

Blog: Monette’s Musings, www.monettebenoit.com

Realtime Court Reporter, Instructor, Consultant, Columnist Educational/Career Advancement

Please contact Monette@CRRbooks.com to request permission to repost or to add a link to this article, which was first posted on www.mylegal.com, September 16, 2009.

Monette Benoit, B. B.A., CCR, CRI, CPE 
Realtime Court Reporter, Instructor, Consultant, Columnist 
Coach, Tutor and Multiple Title Author of Books & Test Prep for the
Court Reporting
& Captioning Industry

About the Author:

Monette Benoit, B.B.A., CCR, CRI, CPE, is a JCR Contributing Editor for the National Court Reporters Association, NCRA.

She is the author of multiple books and Test Prep for the Court Reporting & Captioning Industry to include the national and state RPR, RMR, RDR, CSR ‘Written Knowledge Exam’ Textbook, Workbook, Companion Study Guide, ‘The CRRT WKT’ CD Software Program, Advanced SAT, LSAT, GRE, Real-Time Vocabulary Workbook and ‘CATapult’ Your Dictionary CD Software Program series.

Books, CDs, private tutoring, mentoring services and articles may be referenced www.crrbooks.com/

Monette is an experienced consultant, instructor, real-time court reporter, tutor, life coach, CART provider, columnist.

She teaches, tutors and coaches home-study students, college students, court reporters and professionals. Monette speaks to groups at state, national and international conventions about motivation, technology, expanding skills and Deaf, Oral Deaf, Hard of Hearing.

Monette Benoit, B.B.A., Certified Court Reporter, Certified Reporting Instructor, Certified Program Evaluator, Paralegal, may be reached at: http://www.crrbooks.com/ http://www.catapultdix.com/ and All American RealTime/Captioning Services, Inc.: http://www.artcs.com/